Singing in the Shower
by Back of Beyond
Summary: Takes place after 5th book - Further fabbity-fab confessions of Georgia Nicolson. For English readers, the book was called 'And that's when it fell off in my hand.' For Americans it was 'Away laughing on a fast camel.'


_**America, Here We Come!**_

**_Thursday May 5th_**

**7:00am**

It's a world record – up at seven o 'clock on a school day. I barely got to sleep after Vati announced we were off to America last night (he announced we were going last night – we didn't actually _go_ last night.) I can't wait to tell Jas!

**On the way to school**

"Georgia, how exactly do you plan on finding Masimo in America?" Jas said, after I explained the whole going-to-America-and-tracking-down-Masimo. "You don't even know where he's going to be! The only chance you'll find him is if he _happens_ to be staying in the same town as you-"

"What if you find out from Tom where's he going and I persuade my olds to take us there?" I thought. Jas just stared at me like some staring thing.

"What?"

I sighed. "Get Tom to asked Dom where Masimo is going! Then I force Vati to go on holiday there! It's perfect."

"I thought your parents had already decided where you were going. Seattle, wasn't it? You even said they've bought the tickets as well!" Jas was still staring at me as if she was the Wise Woman of the West. Shut up, Old Wise Woman!

**Break**

I told the rest of the Ace Gang about my trip to America and Masimo-tracking plan. They just saluted me. Everything was fabbity-fab.

**Home**

**5:35pm**

All alone, on my own ... what rhymes with own?

**5:45pm**

Okay, got it.

All alone, on my own, in my home, with no-one to phone ...

**5:46pm**

Rubbish.

**6:00pm**

Phoned Dave.

"Dave, it's me, Georgia."

"Hey, Sex Kitty. What can I do for you?"

"Are you with anyone? ... Like Rachel?"

"Nope, you have my un-divided attention! So, what's today's topic? Masimo? Shopping? Masimo? Make-up? Masimo? Parents? Masimo? Or just boys in general?"

I laughed and told him everything about going on holiday to America and tracking Masimo down.

"You're going to track Masimo down? Always thought you were insane but this proves it, big-time. Well, good luck! Bring me back a present!"

**7:20pm**

Busy packing all my clothes. Mutti came in and said I only needed a weeks worth of clothes, but what if Masimo does turn up? A weeks worth of clothes are hardly enough choice for a date, is it? I've already filled an entire suitcase and that's without all my hair products and make-up.

**7:30pm**

Vati just came in and started yelling nonsense at me before walking out again. I was quite shocked for a moment, then Mutti came in and explained what he said in plain English. The short and short of it is that I'm only allowed one suitcase, so if I want to take things besides clothes more than half my clothes are staying here, in England. I feel sorry for them.

**9:00pm**

Phew, packing is tiring. I've managed to get all my necessities into the suitcase, which is about the size of a shoebox. I told Mutti this but she just said her entire wardrobe would fit in it. I said I highly doubted that. I also told her I'd finished packing my suitcase.

"Oh, good. Have you packed your flight bag?" Apparently I 'might want to' take a flight bag, because of the long flight. More than five hours. Stuck next to my family for five hours. Oh, baby Jesus, spare me!

**_Saturday May 7th_**

**6:45am**

There is a fly in the ointment. A rather large fly. Actually, there is at least four three flies.

1. We had to get up at the break of dawn (roughly) to get here two hours early. Our flight takes off at 9:00am, and here we are 6:45!!!

2. We will be on the aeroplane all day. When I complained he said 'We won't be on _all day_, just until late afternoon'. Forgive me if I'm wrong, but isn't early morning to late after noon _all day_???

3. There is no chance that Masimo will be catching my flight seeing as he left yesterday.

4. I can see a map of the USA from where I'm sitting, and I can confirmed America is a lot bigger than I thought it was. Finding Masimo could be tricky ...

**9:29am**

The plane was meant to take off half an hour ago! And we only just got on five minutes ago. The person over the intercom in the Airport said the plane was delayed. Obviously this means we have some mad man at the controls who can't find their way anywhere. They're probably French.

**9:34am**

Our pilot just come on over the intercom on the plane. He's not French – he's Scottish. Enough said, I think.

**Lunch time**

This is hell. I'm sandwiched up against the window with Libby on the other side of me. She keeps screaming out 'Angus!' or 'Gordy!' I swear she even yelled out 'Panties!' once but I can't be sure. Haggis, our pilot, managed to get us off the ground at quarter to ten. I almost started cheering.

This air hostess keeps coming round doing absolutely nothing. She's meant to be helping out people like us (i.e. who aren't the staff) but an hour ago when some baby behind us was sick she scarpered in the other direction. She looks like a Barbie doll. Libby seems to think so too because whenever the woman walks (or rushes) past us she keeps yelling 'Barbie!'

Anyway, after ages of begging Vati and I switched to mum and managed to get her to buy me something decent to eat – not the sandwiches Vati had made us at home. The one I was given was meant to be egg. It looked more like puke.

Vati had to yell down the plane to get Air Hostess Barbie's attention. She was pretending to be deaf.

**2:00pm**

Haggis has just declared clearly (well, as clear as a Scottish accent can get) that we are lost. Oh, wonderful days.

**4:55pm**

I brought Mutti's book _How to Make Anyone Fall in Love with You_ along. After the fiasco with Uncle Eddie discovering the book, I'd come up with a clever tactic so no one knew I was reading this book (including Mutti. Only yesterday was she saying she'd lost a book she wanted to take ... ). I'd taken the cover from a hardback version of _Withering Heights_ (or rather, _Blithering Heights_) and put that over the top of _How to Make Any Twat Fall in love with You_.

**5:00pm**

Perfect-o! Haggis has become de-lost (or un-lost, whichever you want to chose).

**9:25pm**

Haggis managed to land the plane without incident (though I suspect he had help).

**10:30pm**

We finally arrive at the hotel, an hour later. Vati got into a fight with the guy we were renting a car from. I don't know what about. I lost interest. And when we were in the car, driving to our hotel, Vati got us lost. Not such as fabbity-fab start. More a _merde_ start.


End file.
